Welcome to the second installment of "What else don't we know about?"
Next up on our agenda:
I feel like Bill gets a bad rap. I mean, sure. Maybe the only thing I really remember about him from history class is that he got stuck in a bathtub. But is that all there is to know about him?
(also, fyi, when you google image search william taft, the sixth picture to come up is a bathtub. see what i mean?)
He was president of the U.S.A. from 1909 to 1913, making him lucky number 27. But what else don't we know about Bill Taft?
Did you know? Bill didn't have a vice president from 1912-1913?
Did you know? He was the only president to be a judge on the Supreme Court?
Did you know? He was the first president to own a car at the White House?
Did you know? Bill LOVED milk so much that he brought his own cow to the White House? That cow was named Mooly Wolly (so clever). His next cow was named Paulin. And Paulin, bless her heart, was the last cow to ever graze at the White House.
Ok, so what do we learn from this? Getting stuck in a bathtub was maybe the most exciting thing Bill ever did as president. So it's ok if thats the only thing you remember about him.
Said Taft: "I am not in favor of suffrage for women until I can be convinced that all the women desire it; and when they desire it I am in favor of giving it." Nov. 2, 1909.
(ps i just told my friend kevin that i was writing a blog about taft and guess what he said? "did you mention he got stuck in the bathtub at the white house?!")
It's hard regaining blogging composure after my last post. It's also hard regaining composure over my appetite. I seriously didn't feel like eating the two days after the challenge. And I'm telling you right now I never feel like eating ramen again. Ever.
Anyways, I watch four TV shows on a decently regular basis while I'm here. No thanks to you, Hulu.
First off, we know and love Celebrity Apprentice.
Well, bad news friends.
My love Bill Goldberg was fired.
I know right?! Why would this happen?! I wish the girls would've lost so that one of them would've been fired, but no. The men had to lose and I was torn. I didn't know who I wanted to leave. We had Curtis Stone, Bret Michaels, and Goldberg. They are all so entertaining.
I'll miss you Goldberg. And your really weird sunglasses that make you look like a bug. Also, I love a man with a neck the same size as his entire head.
Also this past week, we finally had the finale of Project Runway. It was mundane. But I was glad Seth Aaron won, despite his hair. He was for sure the best of the three, which was why it was so mundane. And why was Faith Hill a guest judge? Some things I'll never know.
The other two shows I watch? Glee (who doesn't) and The Colbert Report. Sue Sylvester is the best character on TV right now.
I woke up happy to be living on this just strikingly beautiful planet, jumped out of bed, and threw on some clothes before walking to work.
Yeah. Did you hear that? I'm soooo environmentally friendly. I don't shower and I walk to work. I'm straight up green.
Work was solid, as it was Thursday and Thursdays I only have to teach 3 classes. So hello Facebook and Gchat! Can't complain.
I got home from work and quickly finished my Earth Day outfit. Its a new tradition I just started. Every year on Earth Day I'm going to make an outfit out of recycled materials. Yesterdays genius was found in the form of various plastic bags cut up and taped together in a classy yet unique vintage inspired dress.
Essentially, I was wearing a trash bag.
But that was a good decision.
The bad decision would soon follow.
There is a place in our little city that has a Ramen Challenge. Now, if you know me, you know I love a good challenge, especially if it involves food.
And ramen? Puhhhleease. I've been eating ramen my whole life. Its like I was preparing for last night since I was 10.
Or so I was hoping.
This challenge was to eat a GIANT bowl of ramen in 20 minutes. If you can do it, dinner is free.
There were nine of us at dinner. Four of us decided to undertake perhaps the worst decision of all time.
We were each seated at our own tables. The bowls were brought out to us. It was hearty in its portion but was sure I could do it. It's all mental, right? I psyched myself up to what would be the greatest physical obstacle ever encountered.
The owner of the restaurant was shocked that we were about to try this. He told us no women had ever even tried it before. Alex and I knew we could do this. We could break these stereotypes and show Korea whats up.
I had my game face on. The timer was set. We were off!
The soup and noodles burned as we shoved them in our mouths. My tongue still feels the pain of last night.
I perfected the system. The noodles had to cool down before I could eat them. This was the only way.
It was a good decision to wear my plastic bag dress. I didn't have to worry about getting messy. I could just focus.
The time was running out and I was getting nervous. There was still so much food to go! The broth and a handful of noodles was the only thing stopping me.
20 minutes ended. The owner came and said that since we were girls we could keep going, but we could no longer use our chopsticks and we could not put our bowls down.
Everyone started to crowd around us. Out of the four of us, I was the closest. The ramen had burned me and my stomach was starting to ache. But I wanted it. I wanted it bad.
In Korea (and come to find out, every Asian country), they have an infatuation with the crane game. Sometimes called the claw game.
You know, the game that you pay to play and most of the time lose? And all there is to win is a cheap stuffed animal that probably only costs $1 in real life, but getting it with a crane makes you want to spend won after won or dollar after dollar, eventually resulting in you spending over ten dollars only to walk away empty handed?
This is my life.
But I can't stop playing the crane game.
I walk past 5 just on the way to school. They are in front of most Family Marts, there are rooms dedicated to multiple crane games next to every movie theatre. These are the places I go the most, and these are the crane games that take away my money.
I have not once won something from the crane game. Ever.
But I will not give up. I will one day defeat the game.
COT reapplies her makeup maybe...12 times a day? A slight exaggeration, but only slight. I'll go with 8 times.
Yesterday as she's putting on her face, she just starts to stare at me. Mid reapplication.
I see her staring but I decide not to acknowledge it. Less interaction is a key to success.
But then she breaks the silence.
"Do you shave your eyebrows?"
Ehhhh, what? Excuse me?
Me: "Do I shave my eyebrows? No...I mean, I pluck. I gotta pluck. But I don't shave them"
(Let me just insert here that I used to be SUPER self conscious about my eyebrows. I know. I had weird insecurities (eyebrows, feet, forehead). I mean, who really cares about eyebrows? I did.)
I had no idea what she was referring to when she asked if I shave my eyebrows. I mean, by no means are my eyebrows even close to being small enough to be considered 'shaved'.
She continues, "Oh! You do not shave? It looks like your left one is missing hair"
Ok ok, here's the deal. My left eyebrow has a weird little bald streak. Its not very noticeable. In fact, I just went through my pictures so you could have a visual, but I'm finding it difficult to find a photo where it is obvious. So you'll just have to remember this blog and notice it when I'm back. But don't make fun of me for it.
I respond back to COT, "Yeah yeah, its kind of bald in one part. It's always been like that. I wouldn't do that on purpose, believe me"
Then she tries to hand me her eyebrow pencil.
"Oh, no thanks. I've never used one of those"
COT, "Really? I've never noticed your eyebrow before! I thought you might use it"
As a life-time supporter of 7-11 and its sales, you know how I feel about the lack of certain products in its Korean stores.
I love slurpees. I always have and I probably always will. They are the perfect way to cool you down on a hot day and sometimes its the only thing that sounds good.
Slurpees change lives. They bring peace. They bind people together. They inspire.
Growing up, going to 7-11 was a big deal. You see, the closest 7-11 was at the bottom of a giant hill. Getting to this heaven on Earth was easy-we would coast down in about five minutes on our bikes.
We'd walk into the store and stare at the endless amounts of candy, but ultimately we'd always end up buying nachos (with that fake but oh-so delicious chili and cheese) and a slurpee. No matter how many times we went, it was always a good decision.
But each time it was like we'd forget about the hill. The hill that was so fun to ride down on, but such a beast to ride back up. Especially with nachos and a slurpee. Those are two things that do not just sit there in your backpack waiting to be devoured. They seem to crawl and spill in every possible way.
It was a tough trip back home, but once we were in the comfort o f our own home, we could adequately enjoy the taste of 7-11.
So, back to slurpees. We all know that Korean 7-11's lack this necessity. Bad idea, Korea.
After getting to Taipei, and on our way to the hotel, we decided to hit up a 7-11 for some snacks and drinks.
There, sitting in the middle of the Taiwanese 7-11, was the slurpee machine.
It beckoned me. It called my name. I went.
I went everyday I was in Taiwan. Ok, I went more than once everyday.
One of the first things I do when I get home is take off my pants.
(Best part of having my own place. Hands down.)
So I understand how one would want to do it.
I walked into my office this morning and I had almost forgotten about yesterdays episode.
About five minutes after I sit down, the four culprits from yesterdays after-school class marched into my office. COT had mentioned that they would be punished today, but I didn't realize it would happen in my office. In front of me. I don't want to see children be hit.
The thing is, I didn't know I would be expecting them. I didn't know if I was just supposed to lecture them and get mad. COT was not in the office. So the four boys walk in and one mumbles an apology. Then they just stand there. I looked at them and tried to be tough ("you guys are in big trouble").
COT took forever to come back.
The kids stood there. They glanced at me every once in awhile. They whispered. I could only imagine what they were saying about me.
Then COT finally walked in. I was as nervous as the students. She had her bamboo stick in hand and began to lecture the kid who removed his pants first. She moved to the next kid and he says something. She responds with a Korean "really?" and then looks at me.
Then they leave the room. I don't know where they go.
But now all I can think about is what did that kid say?! Did he tell her I was a really bad teacher? Did he say I told the kid to take off his pants? (because as much as I say that to people my own age, I do NOT say that to students). Did he say that yesterday I just let the kids play Uno the whole time, which isn't even English, but Spanish? I skipped dinner a few times in college! Will I get fired? OMG what if I get fired from playing Uno in class?!
COT hasn't said one word to me since that went down.
And who knows what happened to those kids. One was in my last class and he looked pretty upset.
I did forget to put on deodorant today. I realized this as I walked out of my building this morning. I could have easily just walked back up and fixed this situation, but I kept going. Sometimes I reason that if no one else in the country has to wear it, why should I?
But now I kind of got a whiff of the pit. And I realize: that is why I should wear deodorant.
As far as the second half of my title goes (you know, about how a kid took off his pants), the story goes as follows...
Imagine you're about to start teaching. You're standing in front of about 20 kids in your after-school class. This class is trouble. But you tried to make today fun by having everyone join together for some card games! You're such a thoughtful (or lazy) teacher!
While you are handing out candy for the previous days candy winners, you take attendance of the kids sitting around the classroom. Pretty proud of yourself for knowing most of the kids names, you smile to yourself as you hand Dong-woo his candy. Dong-woo is one of your favorites. He's like a spy for you and tells you when other kids are playing on their phones. He gets some sick pleasure out of ruining his classmates lives. And you kind of respect that.
As you circulate the room, you pay little attention to the table of four boys in the back corner. They are the worst kind of trouble makers. Nothing works to get them to pay attention.
And then, suddenly, your eyes meander over to this corner of boys. Three of them are laughing. Experience tells you that you should look at the fourth boy to figure out the reason for such laughter.
And there he is. The fourth boy.
NOT WEARING PANTS.
He's just sitting there in his underwear.
This kid is in 8th grade.
I felt a sudden range of emotions. First instinct: laugh! Because I am immature and WHAT AM I DOING IN KOREA AND WHY AM I TEACHING AND WHY IS THIS KID NOT WEARING PANTS?! This is my life.
But strangely enough, this desire to laugh was fleeting. It then transformed into a sick anger. This sick anger turned into yelling. And this yelling turned into I HATE THIS KID.
Once the four boys notice that I've noticed, the pantsless wonder begins to put his pants back on. I am livid. I force each boy to go to a separate corner in the room. They are not allowed to speak or move the entire class.
I tried to make it look like the rest of us were having the best time ever, just because I wanted them to feel more pain for their mistake.
After class, I mentioned to COT what happened. "Cot", I said, "Some kid TOOK OFF HIS PANTS. IN CLASS". Her first reaction, "Oh, was he changing his pants?".
I guess its ok to take off your pants if you are changing them. In class.
-Sometimes waking up to a city full of fog makes you feel like you're living in a cloud
-I remembered to eat breakfast
-COT asked me if I'm planning on staying another year.
-I said yes
-I feel good about it
-Taco Bell opens in Seoul soon
-I have really good friends
-Easter is Sunday!
-In one week I will be in Taiwan! Even better, I will be with Jenn! (and steve!)
-I got to play hide-and-go-seek with my students after lunch. Pictures to come. It was awesome.
-A student's parent knew who I was even without me saying a peep. I know I stand out a little bit here, but knowing my students use my name enough in conversation with their parents for the parents to remember my name in passing makes me feel decent.
-I only have to teach two classes tomorrow. I love Friday.
-Last night I bought a sketchbook. I decided I want to be an artist.
-Successful fb and blog stalking occurred
-I make good extra money teaching my annoying after-school class